Tomorrow is the first day of school. I still get a little nervous, but unfortunately this year I'm not that excited. (Yes, I'm bitching again.) I just really thought I'd be somewhere else this year. I'm not excited to meet my new kids. That's pretty bad for a teacher to say. Good things this year...I like the people I work with in my hallway...well, really all through the school. We have a pretty awesome staff as far as teaching, but more than that...they're fun. It definitely helps the day go by. 180 school days to go. 183 work days. Yes folks. I'm counting.
I was very excited to have more personal days this year as I use them to travel. However, I may not be heading to Mardi Gras this year. Can you believe the hurricane? I've been pretty glued to the TV all day and I hope that I'm home from school before it hits as I'll be glued to the TV tomorrow to watch it. Emily evacuated yesterday only to save her clothes, pictures and precious puppy. Can you even imagine what it's going to be like to go back there? When? To what? Very scary...and very sad. Possessions can be replaced, but I'm sure it still is depressing.
Other than this...I don't have much to offer today. I'm still nursing a hangover and I'm promising to get out of party mode ASAP. (Though the school year is tough as a glass of wine at night sometimes is all that helps.)
Oh world let something fantastic happen so that I cannot be totally depressed in my job...
Sunday, August 28, 2005
Thursday, August 25, 2005
You Don't Have to Go Home, But You Can't Stay Here
Oh nooo....it's over. Summer vacation is over.
Tomorrow is the first day back to work (officially because I've been putting my room together since Tuesday.)
Same shit. Different year. I'm kinda excited about that part because finally...
It's nice to not be new.
I've had so many "new" experiences over the past 3 years that finally in one area, I'm not new. I've been in new buildings, new rooms, new grades, etc with career.
I've met new friends, dated new people and got a new dog.
I've visited new places, done new things, experienced new feelings.
I'm sure a bunch of other new stuff I can't think of right now.
But...for my career...it's kinda nice to not be new.
My plans this year are to kinda fly low on the radar screen. Once again (because no one likes to stay in my building) there are a bunch of new people. I'm glad the spotlight is off, magnifying glass is (somewhat) broken and I can relax a little more. Though as much as I like not being new, I was kinda hoping I was new. In a new town. New school. New living place. But, as you can see I've grown from my last bitch posts and I'm looking to the positive.
Should I start the countdown? 184 days to go 'til summer vacation. Yes folks...you can ask any teacher in the book and though they may not say it outloud, we live for June, July and August--and of course those occasional snow days and most especially the beloved 2-hour delay. (A reason it pays to teach in the North.)
Now I just have to get off partymode that hasn't stopped since my Holiday (yes, Renee I'm adopting that word, too!!) And...get my sleep schedule back.
One perk to my job this year....free gym membership for being a head coach. Jackpot because mine just ran out.
I'm so proud of myself for forcing the blog every night now. If I start to slack, please feel free to harrass me.
Tomorrow is the first day back to work (officially because I've been putting my room together since Tuesday.)
Same shit. Different year. I'm kinda excited about that part because finally...
It's nice to not be new.
I've had so many "new" experiences over the past 3 years that finally in one area, I'm not new. I've been in new buildings, new rooms, new grades, etc with career.
I've met new friends, dated new people and got a new dog.
I've visited new places, done new things, experienced new feelings.
I'm sure a bunch of other new stuff I can't think of right now.
But...for my career...it's kinda nice to not be new.
My plans this year are to kinda fly low on the radar screen. Once again (because no one likes to stay in my building) there are a bunch of new people. I'm glad the spotlight is off, magnifying glass is (somewhat) broken and I can relax a little more. Though as much as I like not being new, I was kinda hoping I was new. In a new town. New school. New living place. But, as you can see I've grown from my last bitch posts and I'm looking to the positive.
Should I start the countdown? 184 days to go 'til summer vacation. Yes folks...you can ask any teacher in the book and though they may not say it outloud, we live for June, July and August--and of course those occasional snow days and most especially the beloved 2-hour delay. (A reason it pays to teach in the North.)
Now I just have to get off partymode that hasn't stopped since my Holiday (yes, Renee I'm adopting that word, too!!) And...get my sleep schedule back.
One perk to my job this year....free gym membership for being a head coach. Jackpot because mine just ran out.
I'm so proud of myself for forcing the blog every night now. If I start to slack, please feel free to harrass me.
Wednesday, August 24, 2005
Dumb Question.
This is a really dumb question, but I have to ask.
At an intersection where there is a sign that says Right Turn Signal...
Can you turn on Red?
There isn't a sign that says No Turn On Red.
I think you can turn on Red. I think the first sign is for dumb people reminding them that even though the light is Red, there is still a Green Arrow telling them to turn.
Or for people who are colorblind.
**************
I love when jeans are dirty...meaning you've worn them a few times. They just fit so well have given in all the right spots. However...my jeans smell like a bar. I put some Bath and Body spray on them, but now they just smell like WhiteTea and Ginger/Bar. I suppose I'll Febreeze them...what the hell is in Febreeze anyway that works and B&B doesn't?
Crazy scientists.
Okay...so I'm in a slightly...slightly better mood today. My shitty mood is just directed at other things. Like my custodian that watched me move 28...yes folks...28 fucking desks from my room so I could have tables. Why I got rid of desks? Because these desks have been in school since I was in grade school. (Ahem...that's like 5 years ago, right??) I'm sore as a motherfucker. I'm ready for a beer.
Maybe you'll get an intoxicated post from me tonight.
At an intersection where there is a sign that says Right Turn Signal...
Can you turn on Red?
There isn't a sign that says No Turn On Red.
I think you can turn on Red. I think the first sign is for dumb people reminding them that even though the light is Red, there is still a Green Arrow telling them to turn.
Or for people who are colorblind.
**************
I love when jeans are dirty...meaning you've worn them a few times. They just fit so well have given in all the right spots. However...my jeans smell like a bar. I put some Bath and Body spray on them, but now they just smell like WhiteTea and Ginger/Bar. I suppose I'll Febreeze them...what the hell is in Febreeze anyway that works and B&B doesn't?
Crazy scientists.
Okay...so I'm in a slightly...slightly better mood today. My shitty mood is just directed at other things. Like my custodian that watched me move 28...yes folks...28 fucking desks from my room so I could have tables. Why I got rid of desks? Because these desks have been in school since I was in grade school. (Ahem...that's like 5 years ago, right??) I'm sore as a motherfucker. I'm ready for a beer.
Maybe you'll get an intoxicated post from me tonight.
The Bitch Is Back.
2 days left...and I'm back to work. I'm already counting the days until vacation again. Pathetic? Yes. Reality? Yes. I'm going to be a big fucking baby about it, but I'm really pissed off I didn't get a new job this year. It's mainly due ot location. My job could be shitty somewhere else, too (and it's not that shitty right now, but location...(Now the year isn't up and because school districts are notorious for late interviewing, I'm still holding onto hope.) Last year I interviewed after the school year had already started. However, I think the past few interviews I have been the "token" interview. Meaning...they had someone in mind for the job, but had to interview a few people to make it look good. I don't even know why they really go through all that bullshit. It would be much less grief if they just hired, and interviewed when they really wanted someone new. The only positive thing is that (if I don't get a new job mid-year) I will have 2 years in an urban school which looks good. So am I bitching? Yes. Will I continue to bitch? For a little while at least.
My main bitch is that there is NOTHING to do here. The culture (or lack there of) is depressing when you have to weed out the men by NASCAR numbers, snuff can wears in the back pocket of jeans (holes worn in pockets were only sexy on George Michael) and people who have never left the 13 colonies and think Daytona is a far way to go for vacation. (Not that I've ever been to Daytona...but I don't really care.) I can't say I want someone cultured because there is culture everywhere (I'm pulling the ESL crap on you now and retracting the prior statement of culture.) But, I would like someone who is exposed and would like more exposure. Who goes to NYC not to just "see a show" but wants to hang out in the local neighborhoods, not eat a chain restaurant and try a local beer because it's what the locals do and you're tired of your usual light beer. Someone who doesn't like sushi because they have tried it and it "feels strange in their mouth" (that's from IronChef, kids.) Someone who who says they listen to every kind of music, and actually do listen to every kind of music. Even if it's not popular. Someone who says they like Yoga because it's a hour of time when they are not allowed to talk and not because "I feel so in tune with the world." Someone who admits to liking a good bottle of wine because of the taste, but at home drinks boxed wine because it's just as good and when they want to get drunk, they feel like spending $14 instead of $50. Someone who talks about the books they read because they actually enjoy them and not because they the "thing" to read. (Circa ex-beau who had On the Road sitting in his car for 2 1/2 years.) Someone who's...well...a lot like me, but not me. Mirror image? No. Jigsaw piece. More like it.
You say, "Doesn't everyone want this?" Yeah. You're probably right.
However, I'm just in a bitchy mood tonight. Deal with it.
Maybe it's the moon. Though the full moon just passed. Hey, I'm a Cancer. We react to this shit.
So what am I going to do to make my year better? (You have to know that I won't just wallow in this shit.)
1. I'm learning Spanish. Fluently...or at least as best as I can. I've been reading a basic conversation book every night and sometimes even dream in Spanish...though I'm a lot more fluent in my dreams than in the awake time--it must be in there somewhere then, right?
2. I'm applying to school to work on my PhD. In what? Not totally sure yet. In education obviously, but I have some ideas. I think I need to decide by November (or at least to what school and I guess a program.)
3. I'm going to work on (one of) my books and make a "focused" effort to make some major progress. (One good seller and then I wouldn't have to worry about getting a new job.) Chorizo the Tree Frog--that's my newest children's book.
4, 5, 6...I don't know yet...any suggestions?
Okay...enough for tonight...and sorry, I haven't uploaded all the pictures from the trip yet.
My main bitch is that there is NOTHING to do here. The culture (or lack there of) is depressing when you have to weed out the men by NASCAR numbers, snuff can wears in the back pocket of jeans (holes worn in pockets were only sexy on George Michael) and people who have never left the 13 colonies and think Daytona is a far way to go for vacation. (Not that I've ever been to Daytona...but I don't really care.) I can't say I want someone cultured because there is culture everywhere (I'm pulling the ESL crap on you now and retracting the prior statement of culture.) But, I would like someone who is exposed and would like more exposure. Who goes to NYC not to just "see a show" but wants to hang out in the local neighborhoods, not eat a chain restaurant and try a local beer because it's what the locals do and you're tired of your usual light beer. Someone who doesn't like sushi because they have tried it and it "feels strange in their mouth" (that's from IronChef, kids.) Someone who who says they listen to every kind of music, and actually do listen to every kind of music. Even if it's not popular. Someone who says they like Yoga because it's a hour of time when they are not allowed to talk and not because "I feel so in tune with the world." Someone who admits to liking a good bottle of wine because of the taste, but at home drinks boxed wine because it's just as good and when they want to get drunk, they feel like spending $14 instead of $50. Someone who talks about the books they read because they actually enjoy them and not because they the "thing" to read. (Circa ex-beau who had On the Road sitting in his car for 2 1/2 years.) Someone who's...well...a lot like me, but not me. Mirror image? No. Jigsaw piece. More like it.
You say, "Doesn't everyone want this?" Yeah. You're probably right.
However, I'm just in a bitchy mood tonight. Deal with it.
Maybe it's the moon. Though the full moon just passed. Hey, I'm a Cancer. We react to this shit.
So what am I going to do to make my year better? (You have to know that I won't just wallow in this shit.)
1. I'm learning Spanish. Fluently...or at least as best as I can. I've been reading a basic conversation book every night and sometimes even dream in Spanish...though I'm a lot more fluent in my dreams than in the awake time--it must be in there somewhere then, right?
2. I'm applying to school to work on my PhD. In what? Not totally sure yet. In education obviously, but I have some ideas. I think I need to decide by November (or at least to what school and I guess a program.)
3. I'm going to work on (one of) my books and make a "focused" effort to make some major progress. (One good seller and then I wouldn't have to worry about getting a new job.) Chorizo the Tree Frog--that's my newest children's book.
4, 5, 6...I don't know yet...any suggestions?
Okay...enough for tonight...and sorry, I haven't uploaded all the pictures from the trip yet.
Monday, August 22, 2005
Punta Cana: The Finale
And so it continues....
The trip continued to be great, though a lot less crazy in some respects. Trust me. We still kicked it up, we just left the federal offenses to mil. I hope I have the days right for these instances, but I think a lot is clouded and askewed...
Day 3
So Wednesday after being up until 10:00 that morning, performing Merrymaid duties and finally washing the extinguisher dust off of us, we headed to the sun. Finishing up at the pool we heard some familiar tones. What was that? English? American English? I'm guessing Pennsylvania accents...sounds like eastern PA. Yep...Enter--Philadelphia. Quite refreshing after our two nights wanting a threesome for translation purposes. The only downside to English speaking...oh no...now we have to be careful because they will hear and UNDERSTAND our nicknaming system. However, looks like we met our match as we began chitchatting with them. The nicknames from their end began to fly as well. It was kinda like being back in college and the new freshman class comes. Inevitable nicknames are assigned. We three girls fortunately were given "the Steelers" given our locality in the states. We chatted amongst the PhillyCoral and headed back to get ready for dinner. Great Spanish dinner, I might add.
Danni and Renee b-lined for the SportsBar later on and I stayed back for a bit. Two nights of partying, new food (and I think a bad clam at lunch) called for some maitenance. Like a good little frat girl, I puked and rallied. (Drastic times call for drastic measures...and I'm pretty sure it was the clam.) Javi met us out and new games began.
One: Javi definitely behaved himself and I also found out that he once dressed up as a fireman. It must be in his blood...or as he put it for Barcelonians: "I think it's the paella."
Two: What was this? A makeshift beerbowling table in the DR? Ah...I knew it would follow us.
If the international language is supposed to be love, then the international game is beerbowling. So far on this trip...score 2 for the Americanas.
We sat and shot the shit with Javier (see you in Spain next year, Javi!) and chatted it up with our new friends...the Gotti boys (Bill, Brian and Brandon) and Allison and Todd (who reminds me of the guy in Bring It On. New friends and easy communication. We called it a somewhat early night as estamos muy cansada. (Shit...if I had only known that phrase the night before!)
Day 4/5/6?? I don't know anymore!
Day four brought us the beach, sun and massages. Ah...massages on the beach. I know what you're thinking, ladies. Hot foreign men rubbing our bodies in almond oil. Well...kinda. Almond oil, but more like burlesque Dominican women. That's alright. As we head up for our massages I asked Danni if I should take my shirt off. She thought yes probably...so this being a topless beach I'm not TOO concerned. I can do this. I can do this. So I take off the tankini top and hop on the table...face down. Once again more inaudible Spanish and I respond with "No comprende. Hable mi amiga." Yes...thank God again for Renee, though only to inform me that I need to be laying on my back. Great. Thanks Danni! Now my two perky (heh, heh) bosoms are staring Jimmy Superfly Snuka in the face. (Note to self...learn how to say "Puedes darme un toalla?") Needless to say I managed to fumble through and get a towel. All in all the massages were great (though we got molested a bit by the women...I suppose they just wanted to make sure we were relaxed.)
Off to dinner that night at the Pan-Asian place. Okay...but not as good as the Spanish place. We met up with the Gotti boy (Carmine,) Allison, BringItOn and introducing...the YinYang twins. Cousin Kevin showed up the Gotti boys were broken and the YinYang twins emerged. Most of them tuckered out early as did Renee with a cold (probably from the extinguidor.) As Danni cleaned up the pool table with her skills (though Allison and I gave a valient effort with the two games we won) we met Matteo. Ah Matteo. Cute. Young, cute. Much later on with more and more cervezas and plenty of shots. Danni and I took the night by storm. Later on two more Italianas showed up looking a lot like this and this. Everyone wants a HockeyCut! We even taught these Italian boys some English. Something like, "Your friend? She puke."
Next day...we are scheduled for a Party Boat. Sadly, Danni couldn't make it as the 10 shots the night before put her over the edge. Renee and I headed out (and how brave she was!) We did some snorkeling and then partied on the boat. The crew was amazing! The had an entire routine from steel drums to dressing up as Michael. They also had a limbo contest in which the captain literally was limboing under a pole that was no more (personally I think less) than 18" off the ground. (I shit you not.) Later on that night we played some card games with the PhillyCoral and had some relaxing times hanging out.
We enjoyed our last times at the beach and pool and whined about having to go home. (We really should move to Spain where our vacations can be a month!) We had our last dinner night at a seafood restaurant that was pretty good....better than Asian, but not as good as Spanish. Went back and packed and headed out for some gambling a nightcap(s). Moral of the story: quit while you're ahead. (I never listen to my own advice...but I had fun at that blackjack table.) Renee and I ended up at the casino later on that evening with the YinYang twins and well...all in all...it was a great fucking trip.
I would love to go back there next year. Can we repeat the craziness of this year's trip? Um....I'd like to say no, but that's what we said about the first night.
Had to ride the train...had to ride the train.
Well folks...these vacation ladies are signing off for the year....hasta luego. Look for more adventures to come in the fall. You know I'll be jet-setting somewhere.
Until then...back to the Girl in the Corner!
The picture link will be up tonight or tomorrow in the other links.
The trip continued to be great, though a lot less crazy in some respects. Trust me. We still kicked it up, we just left the federal offenses to mil. I hope I have the days right for these instances, but I think a lot is clouded and askewed...
Day 3
So Wednesday after being up until 10:00 that morning, performing Merrymaid duties and finally washing the extinguisher dust off of us, we headed to the sun. Finishing up at the pool we heard some familiar tones. What was that? English? American English? I'm guessing Pennsylvania accents...sounds like eastern PA. Yep...Enter--Philadelphia. Quite refreshing after our two nights wanting a threesome for translation purposes. The only downside to English speaking...oh no...now we have to be careful because they will hear and UNDERSTAND our nicknaming system. However, looks like we met our match as we began chitchatting with them. The nicknames from their end began to fly as well. It was kinda like being back in college and the new freshman class comes. Inevitable nicknames are assigned. We three girls fortunately were given "the Steelers" given our locality in the states. We chatted amongst the PhillyCoral and headed back to get ready for dinner. Great Spanish dinner, I might add.
Danni and Renee b-lined for the SportsBar later on and I stayed back for a bit. Two nights of partying, new food (and I think a bad clam at lunch) called for some maitenance. Like a good little frat girl, I puked and rallied. (Drastic times call for drastic measures...and I'm pretty sure it was the clam.) Javi met us out and new games began.
One: Javi definitely behaved himself and I also found out that he once dressed up as a fireman. It must be in his blood...or as he put it for Barcelonians: "I think it's the paella."
Two: What was this? A makeshift beerbowling table in the DR? Ah...I knew it would follow us.
If the international language is supposed to be love, then the international game is beerbowling. So far on this trip...score 2 for the Americanas.
We sat and shot the shit with Javier (see you in Spain next year, Javi!) and chatted it up with our new friends...the Gotti boys (Bill, Brian and Brandon) and Allison and Todd (who reminds me of the guy in Bring It On. New friends and easy communication. We called it a somewhat early night as estamos muy cansada. (Shit...if I had only known that phrase the night before!)
Day 4/5/6?? I don't know anymore!
Day four brought us the beach, sun and massages. Ah...massages on the beach. I know what you're thinking, ladies. Hot foreign men rubbing our bodies in almond oil. Well...kinda. Almond oil, but more like burlesque Dominican women. That's alright. As we head up for our massages I asked Danni if I should take my shirt off. She thought yes probably...so this being a topless beach I'm not TOO concerned. I can do this. I can do this. So I take off the tankini top and hop on the table...face down. Once again more inaudible Spanish and I respond with "No comprende. Hable mi amiga." Yes...thank God again for Renee, though only to inform me that I need to be laying on my back. Great. Thanks Danni! Now my two perky (heh, heh) bosoms are staring Jimmy Superfly Snuka in the face. (Note to self...learn how to say "Puedes darme un toalla?") Needless to say I managed to fumble through and get a towel. All in all the massages were great (though we got molested a bit by the women...I suppose they just wanted to make sure we were relaxed.)
Off to dinner that night at the Pan-Asian place. Okay...but not as good as the Spanish place. We met up with the Gotti boy (Carmine,) Allison, BringItOn and introducing...the YinYang twins. Cousin Kevin showed up the Gotti boys were broken and the YinYang twins emerged. Most of them tuckered out early as did Renee with a cold (probably from the extinguidor.) As Danni cleaned up the pool table with her skills (though Allison and I gave a valient effort with the two games we won) we met Matteo. Ah Matteo. Cute. Young, cute. Much later on with more and more cervezas and plenty of shots. Danni and I took the night by storm. Later on two more Italianas showed up looking a lot like this and this. Everyone wants a HockeyCut! We even taught these Italian boys some English. Something like, "Your friend? She puke."
Next day...we are scheduled for a Party Boat. Sadly, Danni couldn't make it as the 10 shots the night before put her over the edge. Renee and I headed out (and how brave she was!) We did some snorkeling and then partied on the boat. The crew was amazing! The had an entire routine from steel drums to dressing up as Michael. They also had a limbo contest in which the captain literally was limboing under a pole that was no more (personally I think less) than 18" off the ground. (I shit you not.) Later on that night we played some card games with the PhillyCoral and had some relaxing times hanging out.
We enjoyed our last times at the beach and pool and whined about having to go home. (We really should move to Spain where our vacations can be a month!) We had our last dinner night at a seafood restaurant that was pretty good....better than Asian, but not as good as Spanish. Went back and packed and headed out for some gambling a nightcap(s). Moral of the story: quit while you're ahead. (I never listen to my own advice...but I had fun at that blackjack table.) Renee and I ended up at the casino later on that evening with the YinYang twins and well...all in all...it was a great fucking trip.
I would love to go back there next year. Can we repeat the craziness of this year's trip? Um....I'd like to say no, but that's what we said about the first night.
Had to ride the train...had to ride the train.
Well folks...these vacation ladies are signing off for the year....hasta luego. Look for more adventures to come in the fall. You know I'll be jet-setting somewhere.
Until then...back to the Girl in the Corner!
The picture link will be up tonight or tomorrow in the other links.
Thursday, August 18, 2005
What Happens in Punta Cana, Stays in Punta Cana
I know you've been eagerly awaiting this...pictures will come soon once I get them set up...for now...enjoy the read.
Party's over...
We're back and I think I can speak for Danni and Renee...we'd rather be in Punta Cana. It was absolutely beautiful. (Pictures will be coming soon...) Here's a brief recap...
Weather...perfect. It really wasn't as hot as I imagined. It rained almost every night for about 2 minutes. We only got a little caught in it once. Gorgeous A.
Accomodations...beautiful. The place was amazing. Gorgeous outdoor lounges, swim up bar and great pool, beautiful beach with plenty of shaded areas, rooms were beautiful and quite spacious....we saw a few other resorts along the way and we definitely hit the best one. Money well spent.
Food. Excellent. Made our stomachs a little wonky, but I think we just weren't used to the spices, oils, etc. (That and the amount of alcohol consumed.) In any way we kept maitenance with Immodium, water and well...just hanging on.
So all in all it was a good trip.
Now you didn't think I was going to leave you with just that....right?
****Read at your own risk****Goody details upon request...discretion****
So Sunday night Renee and I think it will be a good idea to watch 6 episodes of SATC and drink a bottle of wine...or two. Danni headed off to bed and before we knew it we had and hour and a half of sleep and we were on our way to the airport.
Got on the plane safely and listened to some white trash people and their screaming baby the whole time. "I'll exchange the plane for the resort," Danni said. So I leaned over to the lady across the aisle and asked here where they were staying. Great. Not our resort. I can handle the screaming mongrol. The lady asked if my girlfriends and I ever wanted to have a good girls' night to call her and she handed me her card. Some sort of lingere and sex toy company. Come on now lady...do you think we look like we use sex toys? Okay...but not from that Yinzer.
Land in Punta Cana, slap a bracelet on our wrist and we're off. At this point I'm starting to notice that a lot, a lot of people aren't speaking English. No biggie. I probably would speak English to the people I'm with in foreign country either. I'm sure they're bilingual. Most people from foreign countries (unlike the US) are. I'm sure my 2 1/2 years of Spanish from early highschool one semester of college will get me by....um...thank God Renee was there. Muy bueno, amiga.
We headed to the room, dropped our suitcases, put the suits on and headed to the pool. Swim-up-bar....mmmm. This is what I have been looking for in my life. Two of my favorite things. Swimming and drinking. We had a few drinks, hung out in the pool, tanned. Headed back to the room to take a brief nap, shower/dress and head on out for dinner and to where the night will lead us. And it did....
Okay...now that you have a back story...here's where truly, it goes crazy.
Girls Gone Wild...Punta Cana style.
After dinner we walked around the resort and this is when it's hot. At night with clothes and when you're not in the pool. After I adjusted by wiping down my shins from sweat we had a few drinks in the lobby and another bar. "Let's go check out the discoteque??" Sure. Sounds great. Some creepy island looking boys sauntered on over and the one leaned in and asked me to dance. In replying I headbutted him and I knew then...this was going to be no normal night. Then I saw his face. I'm rather glad I headbutted him as it looked as though he was headbutted...on the way down the ugly tree. Yuck.
Danni and Renee joined me on the dance floor (thank God) and then shortly after that...we met the party. I say the party because it was like Very Bad Things where shit just kept on happening. We ran into.....
The Barcelonians.
(starring in no particular order)
Dieter--he looked German
Mullet Boy--yes he had a mullet, but with extension braids in the back
Ramon--said he played soccer (futbol) but, I don't think so
and finally--
Chorizo the Tree Frog--aka Pedro
By the way...mullets are a hit in Europe. Everyone wants a hockey cut! Though, they're a lot more fashionable then the mullets in USA. Quite frankly...by the end of the week...I was starting to dig 'em.
We did our best to communicate with the one that spoke English. Dieter and MulletBoy headed off and so we shot some pool with Chorizo and Ramon. Good times. Lots of rum, cervesa and chupitos (shots.) Anyone that knows us girls....knows that shots are quite a way to upset the dynamics of a smooth night.
What makes a better night of drinking? The beach of course (one of the 15 words that Chorizo could speak.) Girls to the room for bathing suits! Stumble onto the beach. Chorizo is attempting to molest Danni and Ramon has got his paws into Renee (or rather Ray-naay.) We park it on some lounges with security guard lurking in tow. Renee (Ray-naay) and Ramon are reinacting the beginning scene of Grease in the water, Chorizo is doing his best to molest Danni (as she's yelling to me to don't dare leave her) and I take the first fall of the trip. (Ya knew it couldn't be a night without a fall from me.) Fortunately it was a direct drop to the knees in the ocean to where Ramon chants a "repeate."
As the sun begins to come up Danni and I justify leaving Renee with Ramon due to sunlight and lurking security guard. So here we go. Americana, Americana, Espana.
"I think he's coming back with us."
"No, Molly. He's not."
"No. I think he is.... Chorizo. No aqui. Tu...'resorte??' No. aqui."
"Que? No. motioning of sleeping at our place."
"Um, Danni. I think he's staying with us."
So we all head back to our room and Danni and I hop in the shower together as I (in my best teacher voice) told Chorizo to "sientete uno momento." (Hey...works in my classroom.) He did and we wondered if he was scared not knowing any English and the two of us knowing a lot of Spanglish. As we exited the shower...Chorizo hops in. Well...apparently he's making himself at home. At this point we're pretty much cracking up and taking a craps shoot on who he's going to crash with. The firm "it's not going to be me" came from Danni so I thought...can't be that bad. I could use a little snuggle. So I stroll into the bathroom to check on Chorizo, open the shower door to find him scrubbing down with some Pantene and offer him..."pantelones?" "Ok (word number 3.)
As he strolls out in my candystriped pj pants I give him the old slap on the bed and "aqui."
"Yous? Ok!"
And he takes a little skip dive in-the little shit that he was. (While he was in the shower we peaked at his jeans...29". Poquito!)
I wondered why Danni was so eager to pass doochie to the left hand side. So I could "take one for the team." He was...as we named him...a tree frog. Serioulsy the worst kisser ever. Terrible. Efe. But, hey...it was someone to cuddle with and I'm not a person that gives up. I know I'm a good kisser so maybe I can send this Spainard home with some new American technique. Ah, no. Then a turn of the door and it's Ray-naay and Ramon. Chorizo decides to speak at this point and give me the international "shhh" and "es mi amigo" and pulls the covers over his head. What? He is a fucking frog. (Not to mention his stature doesn't help in making him goliath.) So eventually racking my brain for Spanish a stop sign passed in my head. "Pare." Vamos. Excellent. So I rattled that off and he finally, finally left. Terrible. F. (But, really funny.)
So the next day on the beach (at around 1 since I didn't get to bed until morning) we recapped the night. "Now that was crazy. Wonder what tonight will bring. Can't be as nuts as last night..."
Oh....but it was. Worse. Crazy.
That....was only Day One.
Day Two -Dos Dia
Day Two consists of us rolling out of bed, beach, pool, dinner...let's go out. What will happen tonight. You can't even imagine.
Day Two Cast
Danni, Renee, Molly--Girls Gone Wild
Ramon--favorite words..."swimming pool"
Chorizo the Tree Frog--can now speak "I'm Chorizo" (Good thing I taught English as a Second Language!)
MulletBoy
Dieter
Introducing "The Hobbits"--dos mas poquito Barcelonians
and featuring,
the one.
the only.
Javier--Fireman extrordianaire.
We hit the casino that night for a short stint, had drinks at the bar across from it and to avoid the sweatfest from the night before Renee suggests we take the train/tram that shuttles the resort. (And I found out "resorte" means "springs" so I'm glad I told Chorizo "you spring.")
As we approach the train...who are the conductors in the first car?? The Barcelonians. They greeted us with a "Chorizo" yell and three little girls began to giggle.
"Had to ride the train, Renee. Had to ride the train."
We headed off to the sports bar to lube our stomachs with cervezas and were on to the discoteque. In our best "it got weird" attitudes we avoided the Spanish Village People until Chorizo (and that's what we called him) came over and said hola. (Have you noticed my Spanish improving? Apprendo espanol un poquito dia por dia!) Enter "The Hobbits." They seriously were the smallest people I have ever seen. I'll bet their jeans were 27". Chorizo and Ramon exit discoteque with us and head to the sports bar.
Enter--Javier.
Javi at least speaks English very well...this is a huge plus as Renee is exhausted translating and I'm tired of signing with Chorizo the Tree Frog. We laugh, party and Javi is a hit. Swearing up a storm and screaming his favorite words of the night "Fucking liar." Put a Spanish accent on the with a little gay flair and what do you have--Javi.
Chorizo and I duck out and head back to the room...only to be followed by the "Jacuzzi Crew." Javi, Danni, Renee, Ramon. Here's how the rest transpired...I think.
"Jacuzzi!!!" hahahah. Jump, jump. Pile on the bed.
"I smell a smoke bomb." hahaha. "I think Javi set off a smoke bomb in the stairwell."
"NO!"
"WAIT!"
(Bunch of inaudible Spanish)
Spppssssssssshhhhhhhhhh!!
"What the fuck?"
(I dive under the covers)
(Bunch of inaudible Spanish...lots of coughing)
"Malley" (That's how my name sounds with a Spanish accent)
I run out to the balcony, clothes in hand.
"You have problema with sppssh sppssh?" (from security guard)
"Noooo..." (from Danni as white smoke billows from the room over her head)
"You come down and kiss me?" (security)
"Manana, manana" (from Danni as more smoke billows)
"Federal offense, Danni! Federal offense"
Exit Javi--off the balcony.
Exit Renee, Ramon, Pedro (I'd learned his name at this point) and me.
Looks a lot like Saving Private Ryan or Apocalypse Now.
"What...ack, ack..the fuck..ack, ack...just happened? Oh my God...we're going to be in that Dominican jail we saw on the way in...fuck, fuck, fuck."
Had to ride the train Renee. Had to ride the train.
When Pedro and I return it looks as though a CSI crime lab has been through and everything is magically, well, gone. Was it a dream? No...called Danni and Javi's maid service. Javi apparently jumped off the balcony after Pedro (we think he was a fisherman) threatened to kill him. I guess he meant it. Javi returned to see the damage and something like this transpired...
"Hoh boy. I did not think so much come out. Just a little and then...hoh boy. Hokay. I clean this up."
Strip down to his skivvies and off he went wiggling his cute little ass all over the floor with towels.
Thank God for Danni, Javi and their Merrymaids service they provided.
Renee and I did a once more clean up as she went and did her best Carol Burnett impression by stealing the maids' mop from the maid closet. Then...the dilema starts.
Do we tell? Do we not? Do they know? Do they not? (Phone rings)
Three little deer in headlights.
Had to ride the train, Renee. Had to ride the train.
In the end I truly think the maid service/resort were as clueless as we were as to what happened. Before we knew it we were in a Vietnam-like bombing. Before they knew it the mess was gone. Later on in the morning an important looking person from the maid staff peeked in our door --assuming to see the explosion in our room--and there was nothing. Now the stariwell and hallway were covered, but nothing in our room. I truly think they were baffled. So we gave the maid $30 in hush money and called it a day.
Still nervous and convinced we were just going fess up, we headed down to the front desk to make reservations for dinner (because it might have been our last) and...nothing. Nada.
We made it.
Now the rest of the week was a little slower, but still and adventure.
This was Day Two.
Day three and conclusion of the week will be in the next entry....
Day three--Enter--Americanas "The Gotti Boys."
Party's over...
We're back and I think I can speak for Danni and Renee...we'd rather be in Punta Cana. It was absolutely beautiful. (Pictures will be coming soon...) Here's a brief recap...
Weather...perfect. It really wasn't as hot as I imagined. It rained almost every night for about 2 minutes. We only got a little caught in it once. Gorgeous A.
Accomodations...beautiful. The place was amazing. Gorgeous outdoor lounges, swim up bar and great pool, beautiful beach with plenty of shaded areas, rooms were beautiful and quite spacious....we saw a few other resorts along the way and we definitely hit the best one. Money well spent.
Food. Excellent. Made our stomachs a little wonky, but I think we just weren't used to the spices, oils, etc. (That and the amount of alcohol consumed.) In any way we kept maitenance with Immodium, water and well...just hanging on.
So all in all it was a good trip.
Now you didn't think I was going to leave you with just that....right?
****Read at your own risk****Goody details upon request...discretion****
So Sunday night Renee and I think it will be a good idea to watch 6 episodes of SATC and drink a bottle of wine...or two. Danni headed off to bed and before we knew it we had and hour and a half of sleep and we were on our way to the airport.
Got on the plane safely and listened to some white trash people and their screaming baby the whole time. "I'll exchange the plane for the resort," Danni said. So I leaned over to the lady across the aisle and asked here where they were staying. Great. Not our resort. I can handle the screaming mongrol. The lady asked if my girlfriends and I ever wanted to have a good girls' night to call her and she handed me her card. Some sort of lingere and sex toy company. Come on now lady...do you think we look like we use sex toys? Okay...but not from that Yinzer.
Land in Punta Cana, slap a bracelet on our wrist and we're off. At this point I'm starting to notice that a lot, a lot of people aren't speaking English. No biggie. I probably would speak English to the people I'm with in foreign country either. I'm sure they're bilingual. Most people from foreign countries (unlike the US) are. I'm sure my 2 1/2 years of Spanish from early highschool one semester of college will get me by....um...thank God Renee was there. Muy bueno, amiga.
We headed to the room, dropped our suitcases, put the suits on and headed to the pool. Swim-up-bar....mmmm. This is what I have been looking for in my life. Two of my favorite things. Swimming and drinking. We had a few drinks, hung out in the pool, tanned. Headed back to the room to take a brief nap, shower/dress and head on out for dinner and to where the night will lead us. And it did....
Okay...now that you have a back story...here's where truly, it goes crazy.
Girls Gone Wild...Punta Cana style.
After dinner we walked around the resort and this is when it's hot. At night with clothes and when you're not in the pool. After I adjusted by wiping down my shins from sweat we had a few drinks in the lobby and another bar. "Let's go check out the discoteque??" Sure. Sounds great. Some creepy island looking boys sauntered on over and the one leaned in and asked me to dance. In replying I headbutted him and I knew then...this was going to be no normal night. Then I saw his face. I'm rather glad I headbutted him as it looked as though he was headbutted...on the way down the ugly tree. Yuck.
Danni and Renee joined me on the dance floor (thank God) and then shortly after that...we met the party. I say the party because it was like Very Bad Things where shit just kept on happening. We ran into.....
The Barcelonians.
(starring in no particular order)
Dieter--he looked German
Mullet Boy--yes he had a mullet, but with extension braids in the back
Ramon--said he played soccer (futbol) but, I don't think so
and finally--
Chorizo the Tree Frog--aka Pedro
By the way...mullets are a hit in Europe. Everyone wants a hockey cut! Though, they're a lot more fashionable then the mullets in USA. Quite frankly...by the end of the week...I was starting to dig 'em.
We did our best to communicate with the one that spoke English. Dieter and MulletBoy headed off and so we shot some pool with Chorizo and Ramon. Good times. Lots of rum, cervesa and chupitos (shots.) Anyone that knows us girls....knows that shots are quite a way to upset the dynamics of a smooth night.
What makes a better night of drinking? The beach of course (one of the 15 words that Chorizo could speak.) Girls to the room for bathing suits! Stumble onto the beach. Chorizo is attempting to molest Danni and Ramon has got his paws into Renee (or rather Ray-naay.) We park it on some lounges with security guard lurking in tow. Renee (Ray-naay) and Ramon are reinacting the beginning scene of Grease in the water, Chorizo is doing his best to molest Danni (as she's yelling to me to don't dare leave her) and I take the first fall of the trip. (Ya knew it couldn't be a night without a fall from me.) Fortunately it was a direct drop to the knees in the ocean to where Ramon chants a "repeate."
As the sun begins to come up Danni and I justify leaving Renee with Ramon due to sunlight and lurking security guard. So here we go. Americana, Americana, Espana.
"I think he's coming back with us."
"No, Molly. He's not."
"No. I think he is.... Chorizo. No aqui. Tu...'resorte??' No. aqui."
"Que? No. motioning of sleeping at our place."
"Um, Danni. I think he's staying with us."
So we all head back to our room and Danni and I hop in the shower together as I (in my best teacher voice) told Chorizo to "sientete uno momento." (Hey...works in my classroom.) He did and we wondered if he was scared not knowing any English and the two of us knowing a lot of Spanglish. As we exited the shower...Chorizo hops in. Well...apparently he's making himself at home. At this point we're pretty much cracking up and taking a craps shoot on who he's going to crash with. The firm "it's not going to be me" came from Danni so I thought...can't be that bad. I could use a little snuggle. So I stroll into the bathroom to check on Chorizo, open the shower door to find him scrubbing down with some Pantene and offer him..."pantelones?" "Ok (word number 3.)
As he strolls out in my candystriped pj pants I give him the old slap on the bed and "aqui."
"Yous? Ok!"
And he takes a little skip dive in-the little shit that he was. (While he was in the shower we peaked at his jeans...29". Poquito!)
I wondered why Danni was so eager to pass doochie to the left hand side. So I could "take one for the team." He was...as we named him...a tree frog. Serioulsy the worst kisser ever. Terrible. Efe. But, hey...it was someone to cuddle with and I'm not a person that gives up. I know I'm a good kisser so maybe I can send this Spainard home with some new American technique. Ah, no. Then a turn of the door and it's Ray-naay and Ramon. Chorizo decides to speak at this point and give me the international "shhh" and "es mi amigo" and pulls the covers over his head. What? He is a fucking frog. (Not to mention his stature doesn't help in making him goliath.) So eventually racking my brain for Spanish a stop sign passed in my head. "Pare." Vamos. Excellent. So I rattled that off and he finally, finally left. Terrible. F. (But, really funny.)
So the next day on the beach (at around 1 since I didn't get to bed until morning) we recapped the night. "Now that was crazy. Wonder what tonight will bring. Can't be as nuts as last night..."
Oh....but it was. Worse. Crazy.
That....was only Day One.
Day Two -Dos Dia
Day Two consists of us rolling out of bed, beach, pool, dinner...let's go out. What will happen tonight. You can't even imagine.
Day Two Cast
Danni, Renee, Molly--Girls Gone Wild
Ramon--favorite words..."swimming pool"
Chorizo the Tree Frog--can now speak "I'm Chorizo" (Good thing I taught English as a Second Language!)
MulletBoy
Dieter
Introducing "The Hobbits"--dos mas poquito Barcelonians
and featuring,
the one.
the only.
Javier--Fireman extrordianaire.
We hit the casino that night for a short stint, had drinks at the bar across from it and to avoid the sweatfest from the night before Renee suggests we take the train/tram that shuttles the resort. (And I found out "resorte" means "springs" so I'm glad I told Chorizo "you spring.")
As we approach the train...who are the conductors in the first car?? The Barcelonians. They greeted us with a "Chorizo" yell and three little girls began to giggle.
"Had to ride the train, Renee. Had to ride the train."
We headed off to the sports bar to lube our stomachs with cervezas and were on to the discoteque. In our best "it got weird" attitudes we avoided the Spanish Village People until Chorizo (and that's what we called him) came over and said hola. (Have you noticed my Spanish improving? Apprendo espanol un poquito dia por dia!) Enter "The Hobbits." They seriously were the smallest people I have ever seen. I'll bet their jeans were 27". Chorizo and Ramon exit discoteque with us and head to the sports bar.
Enter--Javier.
Javi at least speaks English very well...this is a huge plus as Renee is exhausted translating and I'm tired of signing with Chorizo the Tree Frog. We laugh, party and Javi is a hit. Swearing up a storm and screaming his favorite words of the night "Fucking liar." Put a Spanish accent on the with a little gay flair and what do you have--Javi.
Chorizo and I duck out and head back to the room...only to be followed by the "Jacuzzi Crew." Javi, Danni, Renee, Ramon. Here's how the rest transpired...I think.
"Jacuzzi!!!" hahahah. Jump, jump. Pile on the bed.
"I smell a smoke bomb." hahaha. "I think Javi set off a smoke bomb in the stairwell."
"NO!"
"WAIT!"
(Bunch of inaudible Spanish)
Spppssssssssshhhhhhhhhh!!
"What the fuck?"
(I dive under the covers)
(Bunch of inaudible Spanish...lots of coughing)
"Malley" (That's how my name sounds with a Spanish accent)
I run out to the balcony, clothes in hand.
"You have problema with sppssh sppssh?" (from security guard)
"Noooo..." (from Danni as white smoke billows from the room over her head)
"You come down and kiss me?" (security)
"Manana, manana" (from Danni as more smoke billows)
"Federal offense, Danni! Federal offense"
Exit Javi--off the balcony.
Exit Renee, Ramon, Pedro (I'd learned his name at this point) and me.
Looks a lot like Saving Private Ryan or Apocalypse Now.
"What...ack, ack..the fuck..ack, ack...just happened? Oh my God...we're going to be in that Dominican jail we saw on the way in...fuck, fuck, fuck."
Had to ride the train Renee. Had to ride the train.
When Pedro and I return it looks as though a CSI crime lab has been through and everything is magically, well, gone. Was it a dream? No...called Danni and Javi's maid service. Javi apparently jumped off the balcony after Pedro (we think he was a fisherman) threatened to kill him. I guess he meant it. Javi returned to see the damage and something like this transpired...
"Hoh boy. I did not think so much come out. Just a little and then...hoh boy. Hokay. I clean this up."
Strip down to his skivvies and off he went wiggling his cute little ass all over the floor with towels.
Thank God for Danni, Javi and their Merrymaids service they provided.
Renee and I did a once more clean up as she went and did her best Carol Burnett impression by stealing the maids' mop from the maid closet. Then...the dilema starts.
Do we tell? Do we not? Do they know? Do they not? (Phone rings)
Three little deer in headlights.
Had to ride the train, Renee. Had to ride the train.
In the end I truly think the maid service/resort were as clueless as we were as to what happened. Before we knew it we were in a Vietnam-like bombing. Before they knew it the mess was gone. Later on in the morning an important looking person from the maid staff peeked in our door --assuming to see the explosion in our room--and there was nothing. Now the stariwell and hallway were covered, but nothing in our room. I truly think they were baffled. So we gave the maid $30 in hush money and called it a day.
Still nervous and convinced we were just going fess up, we headed down to the front desk to make reservations for dinner (because it might have been our last) and...nothing. Nada.
We made it.
Now the rest of the week was a little slower, but still and adventure.
This was Day Two.
Day three and conclusion of the week will be in the next entry....
Day three--Enter--Americanas "The Gotti Boys."
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
Tres O´clock
Um....let´s just say....we arrived. It´s Day (tres dias) and well...here are some bulleted points.
You seriously are not going to believe all this....
Spainards nicknamed Chorizo
Sign language
Coco loco
banana hammocks
no comprende
Fire extinguisher
Gay Javier
Bed time....9 AM
Put you´re reading glasses on and settle with a few beers....it´s going to be great.
You seriously are not going to believe all this....
Spainards nicknamed Chorizo
Sign language
Coco loco
banana hammocks
no comprende
Fire extinguisher
Gay Javier
Bed time....9 AM
Put you´re reading glasses on and settle with a few beers....it´s going to be great.
Sunday, August 07, 2005
Off Like a Cheap Prom Dress.
Well, folks...this Girl is off. Vacation time. The end of the summer has finally come and I am off to Punta Cana! Woo hoo!! Did some last minute impluse shopping for some new sunglasses, sandels and I'm juuuusssst about packed.
I won't get in too much trouble...and don't worry. No Dutch boys allowed. I aint' no Holloway Girl.
See you next week!
I won't get in too much trouble...and don't worry. No Dutch boys allowed. I aint' no Holloway Girl.
See you next week!
Thursday, August 04, 2005
Funny Pool Stories
So I remember as a kid doing mischevious things at the pool. I definitely corrupted my "good" friend, Paige. We had a lot of fun torturing our sisters and just being kids. Today we were discussing how we started a "Poop-er-ama" at the pool.
Oh how funny we were as teens. We decided one day to take a tootsie roll (the big one, not the minis) and mold/shape it and toss it in the baby pool (it kinda looked like Mr Hanky.) "Ewww...someone pooped in the pool!!" Hee-hee...snicker, snicker....Then. The next week. Three days...someone kept pooping in the pool. Gross. I guess our little joke was played back on us.
I also remember torturing our sisters...There was the Dairy Mart down the road that we would walk to and buy junk. Candy, drinks, pepperoni rolls....and gag gifts. (I'm actually smiling because I still think gags are funny.) We decided to buy itching powder and sneezing powder. My sister of course would get the sneezing powder because she is allergic to everything and Paige's sister would get the itching. So as they were goofing off and probably flirting with the cute boys we "snickered" over and dumped the powder over the towels. Nothing happened. No sneezing. No itching...well we didn't see anything. Disappointed in our joke we let it go.
Now I don't know how much later it was...a week, a month, years...we told our sisters what we had done. Turns out itching powder works. Her sister had dried herself off getting out of the pool and was itching horribly but was embarrassed to tell anyone. So if you're playing a gag...get the itching powder--it works.
Oh how funny we were as teens. We decided one day to take a tootsie roll (the big one, not the minis) and mold/shape it and toss it in the baby pool (it kinda looked like Mr Hanky.) "Ewww...someone pooped in the pool!!" Hee-hee...snicker, snicker....Then. The next week. Three days...someone kept pooping in the pool. Gross. I guess our little joke was played back on us.
I also remember torturing our sisters...There was the Dairy Mart down the road that we would walk to and buy junk. Candy, drinks, pepperoni rolls....and gag gifts. (I'm actually smiling because I still think gags are funny.) We decided to buy itching powder and sneezing powder. My sister of course would get the sneezing powder because she is allergic to everything and Paige's sister would get the itching. So as they were goofing off and probably flirting with the cute boys we "snickered" over and dumped the powder over the towels. Nothing happened. No sneezing. No itching...well we didn't see anything. Disappointed in our joke we let it go.
Now I don't know how much later it was...a week, a month, years...we told our sisters what we had done. Turns out itching powder works. Her sister had dried herself off getting out of the pool and was itching horribly but was embarrassed to tell anyone. So if you're playing a gag...get the itching powder--it works.
How Did You Spend Your Summer?
Went to the pool again today and the question came up of how other people spend their summers? Being a teacher I've never come off the academic calendar. Even when I was waitressing and in grad school, I still stuck to the academic calendar. When I say the beginning of the year, I don't, and have never meant January 1. Thanks to my parents I have spent every summer at "the pool." I grew up there...lifeguarded there...worked the daycare there...and fortunately the first summer I had moved away I was able to replace "the pool" with the borough pool in New Wilmington. Therefore...I don't know how else to spend a summer without swimming. How did you spend your summer?
I have so many fond memories of my summers there.
I have so many fond memories of my summers there.
Tuesday, August 02, 2005
How Much Are You Worth with Johnny Depp?
I've always had a fascination with Johnny Depp. Who wouldn't? He's hot, smart (sounding at least) and totally sexy. Long hair, short hair, blonde or brunette...doesn't matter. Back in the mid 80's when 21 Jump Street came out I fell in love. I was also quite fascinated with TigerBeat, Bop and any other teeny-bopper magazine that came out. Off course we girls would trade off the pictures with each other and plaster them to our walls in our bedrooms. I had two fascinations. River Phoenix and Johnny Depp. River had a lot more pictures than Johnny Depp so he took the main wall in my room. Johnny however was a hard commodity to find. Fortunately most of my girlfriends were looking for pics of the Coreys and Kirk Cameron....in which I gladly exchanged for any pics of River or Johnny.
Anyway...I had the picture here in a frame. Yes...a huge fan. Years later...in fact it was 1995. I driving home from my first year of college. As I pulled into the driveway I noticed a couple of boxes of "junk" in the driveway. When I asked my mother what this was all about she said, "Oh I was just cleaning out the basement and thought I'd have that guy who owns the junk store come and get some stuff." I immediately noticed my handheld sand weights (which I never used) and bitched and moaned about how she could throw away stuff that wasn't even hers. In disgust she or I gave up and I think the boxes moved back into the basement OR the junk guy came and got them. I'm not really sure. I do know that he had ALREADY been there a took a load.
Then on one summer day my sister and I were bored and decided to hit the "junk store" and see if we could locate our old...well...junk. We laughed as we went in noticed old duffle bags, games and crap like that. As we rounded the corner she spots a picture frame and says, "What asshole would put a (magazine) picture of Johnny Depp in a frame?" I replied, "Um, that asshole was/is me and that's MY frame." I then looked at her and said, "Shit! I used to hide things behind picture frames like notes from friends or boyfriends so Mom would neb in...I wonder if there is something behind there?" So I grabbed the 2 1/2x3 frame and slid open the back to find....
A picture of myself.
My 6th grade picture to be exact.
Braces and all.
As I look over at my sister who is in tears and hiccupping, I thought...fuck. I have to buy this now. So I dolled out a quarter and bought myself...and Johnny...back. Though...I still think he's worth a lot more.
Maybe he'll read this somehow and we'll become pals...or lovers.
I'm Updated...
County Music Bonanza Verdict: Pretty good. I only wish I was a more avid fan as I wasn't that familiar with the songs. Verdict on the Crowd: HOT, HOT, HOT men....Wow. It was like being at a gay bar except I think these guys were straight. (And by gay bar...I don't mean Illusions in U'town...just a bunch of old Queens there with a few good lookings thrown in.) They all seriously looked like they dropped out of a Hollister ad. Yum!
I may do some short random postings (a couple a day hopefully) within the next week. This Girl will be sunning herself in Punta Cana as of Monday for 8 days. Yippee!! I seriously cannot wait to go.
I caught up on some movies.
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory: Excellent. I LURRRVVVEE Johnny Depp and Tim Burton is always a good show. I'll probably see this again this week or when I get back. (I'll have to post the "Johnny Depp" story, too.
Sideways: Eh...that's where my thumb would be on a Siskel scale. Not good, but not bad. I don't think I'll watch it again.
Wedding Crashers: Funny. Very funny. (I think I wrote about this already.)
I (Heart) Huckabees: I (Hate) Huckabees. Dumb. Very dumb. Definitely runs a tie with Six Degrees of Separation. I couldn't turn it off...though I wanted too...because I thought, maybe, just maybe it'll get better. It didn't. 101 minutes wasted.
Spellbound: I'm watching this as I write. I don't think it's going to hold my attention. I never was (and still am not) a good speller. I follow the rule of "if I don't know how to spell it, I use a different word" rule...if spell check isn't around. Though...I'm very picky of spelling errors...which was part of my elimination process with Match.com. (Another reason why I'm still single I imagine.) tangent.
Other than that...I'm still awaiting a new job and new living conditions. I had an interview last week. (I'm not worried about "the jinx" Jay.) I think it went well , but I always think they go well. It's for a guidance position. Weirdest question: "How would you arrange your office?" I know they were getting at the "openess" factor of not having the desk as the barrier. So I gave them that answer...though...it really was the truth. Keep your fingers crossed or I'm really going to be a nasty bitch. Just kidding. I'm always a nasty bitch.
Okay...time to get some other stuff done and I'm getting to the pool by 12:30 today. I want to finish The Hollywood Dodo (or as I almost always call it "the Hollywood Dildo") before I leave. I could possibly finish it today. If you haven't read it, I recommend. (See Doug...I do like it!!)
I'll be posting some shorts today.
I may do some short random postings (a couple a day hopefully) within the next week. This Girl will be sunning herself in Punta Cana as of Monday for 8 days. Yippee!! I seriously cannot wait to go.
I caught up on some movies.
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory: Excellent. I LURRRVVVEE Johnny Depp and Tim Burton is always a good show. I'll probably see this again this week or when I get back. (I'll have to post the "Johnny Depp" story, too.
Sideways: Eh...that's where my thumb would be on a Siskel scale. Not good, but not bad. I don't think I'll watch it again.
Wedding Crashers: Funny. Very funny. (I think I wrote about this already.)
I (Heart) Huckabees: I (Hate) Huckabees. Dumb. Very dumb. Definitely runs a tie with Six Degrees of Separation. I couldn't turn it off...though I wanted too...because I thought, maybe, just maybe it'll get better. It didn't. 101 minutes wasted.
Spellbound: I'm watching this as I write. I don't think it's going to hold my attention. I never was (and still am not) a good speller. I follow the rule of "if I don't know how to spell it, I use a different word" rule...if spell check isn't around. Though...I'm very picky of spelling errors...which was part of my elimination process with Match.com. (Another reason why I'm still single I imagine.) tangent.
Other than that...I'm still awaiting a new job and new living conditions. I had an interview last week. (I'm not worried about "the jinx" Jay.) I think it went well , but I always think they go well. It's for a guidance position. Weirdest question: "How would you arrange your office?" I know they were getting at the "openess" factor of not having the desk as the barrier. So I gave them that answer...though...it really was the truth. Keep your fingers crossed or I'm really going to be a nasty bitch. Just kidding. I'm always a nasty bitch.
Okay...time to get some other stuff done and I'm getting to the pool by 12:30 today. I want to finish The Hollywood Dodo (or as I almost always call it "the Hollywood Dildo") before I leave. I could possibly finish it today. If you haven't read it, I recommend. (See Doug...I do like it!!)
I'll be posting some shorts today.
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