Speaking of journaling again. I had a really good journal entry yesterday. I even started a poem. It could be because I'm actually opening myself up to dating again. You know, after 2 1/2 years I think it's time. Not that I didn't want to date, but I think secretly I was turning myself away. A guy would look at me and literally I would turn away. I don't know why. I think I turned into every man I ever dated (hated.) It's funny...I know it from my dreams. I know dreams really reflect your subconscience and also kind of help you to work out different problems in your life. I dream a lot that I'm driving, but driving "vehicles" that aren't really drivable machines. Vending machine, invisible car. I think it's that I know that I want to date somebody, but I'm actually scared so I do things that clearly won't get me there. (Turn my head, not go out, etc...) I also would dream of other things (not that I can think of them now) that were diverging from any sort of commitment. So I decided last night that I'm ready. I'm ready to get my heart broken if it happens. (That's the biggest thing I think you have to overcome.) With a new job (finally full-time) I'm ready to grow up. Welcome home, Roxy Carmichael, right?
1 comment:
Go Molly. Good luck in your dating/driving vending machines.
that's an interesting point about ready to be heartbroken again. I've been thinking lately that i'm ready to date again too, but when I think this i also think "but i can never be heartbroken or go through a break up again-i can't handle it" i guess still having this feeling will keep me from being fully ready. hmmm. can you use your psychic abilities to tell me when i'll be ready. sorry--this started out about you and i turned it into a comment about me.
I think it's awesome that you're ready. some boy is going to be really lucky!
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